Dear summer

I cannot, simply cannot supporter, another speck of snow. Je ne peux pas! It’s absurd how much I’ve had to wear my rubber rain boots in the last month. I don’t even know what real shoes feel like, which brings me to this:

These are something like $700+. $700 for CORK. Why? Every summer, these shoes hit the streets with a vengeance more furious than flames to acrylic. It’s like, there’s no other way to channel the beauty of the sun, life and greenery without strapping your uglies to some real dead nature. Personally? I like to do it with a healthy dose of old fashioned bare skin action. What is the deal? I think corks are the sole reason why I hate wedges. Cork wedges ruined it for all wedges.

I can’t even. To make matters worse, they’re almost always paired with a floral maxi dress. My friend told me to never trust a girl in a maxi dress. More like never look at a girl in a maxi dress.

Floral maxi dress and cork wedges: every cutie with a booty thinking she’s Persephone coming up from the underworld.

Je ne peux pas.

Why does net-a-porter have the best Calvin Klein underthings?


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